Snow Days

I have been living in the southern United States for more than twenty years and as a result, I have become very accustomed to the weather. When I first moved here, I was not phased by a little snow but now it gives me anxiety. I don’t travel beyond my front door until the streets are clear, but I don’t worry about it much because I enjoy staying home and more importantly I enjoy time alone. I’m comfortable with myself and my thoughts. That’s not to say that I don’t want to talk to others and this year, I really wanted someone to be snowed in with me, but I am not devastated by the fact that it didn’t happen. I can entertain myself. I love my bed. I can pretend to be a domestic goddess, cooking and cleaning. I can watch every weird documentary and cartoon that I want. I can spend time in prayer and really listen for God. While it is inconvenient and anxiety inducing at first, snow days become a much needed time to rest and reflect. Let it snow. I’m good.

Day 27 – To my Ex

I’m not sure if I have a lot to say to my ex and not because we are on bad terms, but rather the opposite. With one exception, I remain connected to them and consider them friends. I also have a policy of letting go of regrets.Hindsight is always 20/20 but the decisions we make in the midst of a relationship make sense to us at the time.

If I could say anything, ┬áit is simply thank you for loving me. Thank you for looking past the slightly introverted, sometimes high maintenance woman and making a connection. Even through the rough patches, I learned more about myself and am stronger and wiser as a result. Thank you for sharing your hopes and dreams with me, for letting me see you at your most vulnerable times. I admit that I didn’t always understand your direction in life, but I tried my best to support your journey. Thank you for coming into my life and for taking the time to hear me, see me, feel me, know me. Thank you for loving me in your own way.

Party of one

I am single. The challenge for today is to discuss my current relationship. I could go the Facebook copout way and say it’s complicated, but it really isn’t. I am single. I ttried really hard this summer to not be single. I really tried. Oddly enough, both guys, while great, are not very confident in themselves which is unfortunate because they are both great in different ways.

Guy 1 talks a good game.Everything he says is just perfect, but his actions don’t support his flow.At all. I should really call him Cyrano because he is clearly speaking for someone else. Guy 2 is mild mannered, almost a little boring, but I appreciate his simple approach to life. It’s charming to a certain extent, but he lacks ambition and drive and really is most comfortable when I tell him what to do. That’s not exciting to me. I mean I am bossy and I manage people for a living but when it comes to a relationship, I really don’t want to be in charge all the time. If I have to make every single decision, guide every conversation, well I can do that on my own. Consequently, I am single and that is okay for now.